Perspective

I have a couple of questions for you as well. How old is your kid? What are your kid's goals for playing soccer? Does your kid love the game?

Is your kid wanting to play pro for a 4th tier soccer? How does the quality of the soccer where your dad is from matter to your kid who lives here?

What are your obligations to the club? Is it appropriate to leave your kid's team without a player despite your commitment to play?

I understand the concerns regarding expenses and days off from school, but if you commit to a team and then you don't fulfill your obligations (assuming that your club said that you are obligated to play in whatever tourney they assign) then by not going you are teaching your kid it is ok to back out of a commitment when you are "struggling." I disagree that it is ok. Next season you can choose not to play or to play a lower level or to go to another club, but THIS season you should honor your commitment and make it work. You had to know the expense given that you are not a newbie.

I think your dad's comment may be eye-opening to you with regards to whether your sacrifices are worth it, but I also think it is a bit condescending. I think that if you changed the context from soccer to school everyone would think it was a horrible thing to say. If you said to him "Dad, I am struggling to pay for junior to go to UNC Chapel Hill and he said 'Why? I have met your child's friends and they are not smart enough to go to Club X community college over her in country Y'" how would you have taken the conversation? We have what we have here. We aren't England and we aren't Spain. Should we all just give up and play baseball or American football instead because US soccer is subpar and the organizations are crazy?!?! No. Get involved and try to change the system, get out or stop complaining and work within the system we have. Frankly you can work within the current system and still get involved and try to change it.

Yes, however people often take their child out of school for trips (checking out colleges, ski trips, family trips for good and sad reasons). Kids miss classes all of the time for school sponsored sports, drama competition, band competition, academic bowl, etc. School is important, very important. The commitment to school is different from the commitment to a sport you signed a contract for though. Commitment to the team that is relying on you. Classwork can be made up easily when you miss.

I am not condoning missing school for sports as if that should happen regularly. That is a separate issue that could be addressed. There are trade offs though. Do you want to go to a tournament to get scouted? Did you commit to a team that has showcases during school days (nearly all of the big showcases ECNL, DA, NL, Jeff Cup, Disney, CASL do have one day that you miss school at least)? What is the alternative to having a showcase that causes you to miss school? Have more than 1 game per day...risks injury. Have only 2 games and then come back another weekend for the third or fourth game...increased travel costs and less chance that college coaches will be there because they don't want to travel twice. No showcases at all...less chance to be seen be scouts, fewer games to play (which most parents complain about too few games), or more likely to play the same 4 teams that you play all of the time...

The whole process is a challenge. We can try to fix it and come up with solutions or we can quit or we can continue to do the best that we can for our kids. Or a combo of any of those.

Education is very important to me. I have an advanced degree. My kids are very goal oriented and high level students that want to go to high level universities. But I don't quibble about a missed day here and there. Life experiences are also important. Family vacations are important. Working together with your team to achieve a goal. Failing to achieve that goal. Life is full of educational opportunities, many of the best lessons learned are not learned in school.