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Post by atlbuster on Nov 21, 2021 21:19:46 GMT -5
As we get into the final few games of our club season, this has been my daughter's coach's main rallying cry. Today he said it at half time before sitting silently by himself on the end of the bench for the rest of the break. We're in the bottom third of the table and I guess the statement is designed to be inspirational. I looked for it on the Wooden pyramid of success, but couldn't find it. In all seriousness though, I've been curious as to how this isn't a complete self-own. He both shopped for the groceries and cooked the dinner. There is far too much time, money and effort spent by kids and families on high-level soccer to have a coach who bails before the end of a season because he couldn't coach up the group of kids he selected himself and promised to coach until college. Complaining won't change any of it - he'll be back next year (as he has repeatedly reminded the kids). But now his entire team can't wait for tryouts either. Why in a sport that pulls in so much money is it so hard to find coaches that are good people?
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Post by rifle on Nov 21, 2021 22:51:16 GMT -5
"I Can't Wait Until Tryouts"… for a new team to disappoint?
Unbelievably tone deaf.
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Post by papacoach on Nov 22, 2021 0:21:38 GMT -5
Called the money game with no recourse.. Coaches in general aren’t paid for development/player upward movement/Win-Lose records during their seasonal part time gig .. Simply a paycheck.
There’s a few that go beyond but, not many
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Post by soccergurl on Nov 22, 2021 2:48:34 GMT -5
|oops they did it again| |last year afu coach quit in middle of season| |this year afu coach quit in middle of season|
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Post by roki12 on Nov 22, 2021 9:51:44 GMT -5
|oops they did it again| |last year afu coach quit in middle of season| |this year afu coach quit in middle of season| Same parents?
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Post by DunwoodySoccerDad on Nov 22, 2021 9:54:43 GMT -5
|oops they did it again| |last year afu coach quit in middle of season| |this year afu coach quit in middle of season| Same parents? no
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Post by flix on Nov 22, 2021 10:27:53 GMT -5
As we get into the final few games of our club season, this has been my daughter's coach's main rallying cry. Today he said it at half time before sitting silently by himself on the end of the bench for the rest of the break. We're in the bottom third of the table and I guess the statement is designed to be inspirational. I looked for it on the Wooden pyramid of success, but couldn't find it. In all seriousness though, I've been curious as to how this isn't a complete self-own. He both shopped for the groceries and cooked the dinner. There is far too much time, money and effort spent by kids and families on high-level soccer to have a coach who bails before the end of a season because he couldn't coach up the group of kids he selected himself and promised to coach until college. Complaining won't change any of it - he'll be back next year (as he has repeatedly reminded the kids). But now his entire team can't wait for tryouts either. Why in a sport that pulls in so much money is it so hard to find coaches that are good people? I may different because parents have to take some ownership in that also. You don’t end up in the bottom third of the table by accident or because you don’t have a good coach. Football and basketball are all about coaches designing plays and players executing them. Soccer is the one sport where players basically control the game. There may be some joystick coaches out there but for the most part the game is played by the players. So if your players individually aren’t better than the opponent, than chances are likely that you will lose. Soccer is full of parents who like to shift the blame to the coach instead of maybe working with your own kid from time to time. Parents always blame coaches and wonder where all the good ones have gone, they went somewhere else to make easier money than dealing with parents always wanting to chat endlessly about their kid. If these coaches are so horrible, then why don’t you go get your coaching badges and make a difference instead of whining?
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Post by oraclesfriend on Nov 22, 2021 10:29:00 GMT -5
Why do coaches not understand how wrong this kind of statement is?!?! You picked them you should play them. If they are not as good as you hoped then that is the COACH'S FAILURE not the kids (unless the players are not trying or taking things seriously, but still a bit on the coach because he picked them).
One of my kid's coach told the team he was embarrassed to be their coach and they should take that personally. This was at halftime of a game they were tied with a team that is not that good. What the coach should be embarrassed about is that he has been demeaning, rude and a poor communicator on several occasions throughout the season. That is uncalled for behavior. Every player on the team was insulted, some more than others.
I understand that coaches are human and can get frustrated with how things are going, but you have to learn to control the outbursts. These are kids that are young and impressionable and demeaning comments don't motivate. They de-motivate most kids.
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Post by oraclesfriend on Nov 22, 2021 10:36:04 GMT -5
As we get into the final few games of our club season, this has been my daughter's coach's main rallying cry. Today he said it at half time before sitting silently by himself on the end of the bench for the rest of the break. We're in the bottom third of the table and I guess the statement is designed to be inspirational. I looked for it on the Wooden pyramid of success, but couldn't find it. In all seriousness though, I've been curious as to how this isn't a complete self-own. He both shopped for the groceries and cooked the dinner. There is far too much time, money and effort spent by kids and families on high-level soccer to have a coach who bails before the end of a season because he couldn't coach up the group of kids he selected himself and promised to coach until college. Complaining won't change any of it - he'll be back next year (as he has repeatedly reminded the kids). But now his entire team can't wait for tryouts either. Why in a sport that pulls in so much money is it so hard to find coaches that are good people? I may different because parents have to take some ownership in that also. You don’t end up in the bottom third of the table by accident or because you don’t have a good coach. Football and basketball are all about coaches designing plays and players executing them. Soccer is the one sport where players basically control the game. There may be some joystick coaches out there but for the most part the game is played by the players. So if your players individually aren’t better than the opponent, than chances are likely that you will lose. Soccer is full of parents who like to shift the blame to the coach instead of maybe working with your own kid from time to time. Parents always blame coaches and wonder where all the good ones have gone, they went somewhere else to make easier money than dealing with parents always wanting to chat endlessly about their kid. If these coaches are so horrible, then why don’t you go get your coaching badges and make a difference instead of whining? You assume that the kids are not working on their own. Most kids on ECNL/ECRL/GA/DPL are all working on their own or with trainers or both. Plus it is not that the coach is bad because they are in the bottom of the table. It is that the coach is bad because he is an a**hole if he is saying crap like "I can't wait for tryouts." The players may control the outcome, but the coach is responsible for nurturing the talent and teaching tactics. Also if this happened at school by a teacher everyone would be outraged. Let's say a teacher called your kid "stupid" to their face. A coach is a teacher of a game. You CANNOT act like a jerk! Push the players. Point out mistakes. Tell them what skills they need to work on. But don't tell them they are stupid or that you are embarrassed by them or that you can't wait for tryouts to get a new set of players.
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Post by soccergurl on Nov 22, 2021 12:46:51 GMT -5
|oops they did it again| |last year afu coach quit in middle of season| |this year afu coach quit in middle of season| Same parents? |no| |different team| |different players| |different parents| |SAME CLUB| |me think maybe it is club or leadership|
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Post by atlfutboldad on Nov 22, 2021 14:26:43 GMT -5
That team was 2-14. As I heard it the coach felt the team wasn't listening to him and decided it would be best for the team if he stepped away.
TBH the answer is quite simply the talent.
IMO the only way AFU becomes actually competitive is to pay more for top coaches and comp the fees for players they recruit from other clubs. Aside from that, nothing changes anytime soon.
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Post by oraclesfriend on Nov 22, 2021 14:40:12 GMT -5
That team was 2-14. As I heard it the coach felt the team wasn't listening to him and decided it would be best for the team if he stepped away. TBH the answer is quite simply the talent. IMO the only way AFU becomes actually competitive is to pay more for top coaches and comp the fees for players they recruit from other clubs. Aside from that, nothing changes anytime soon. If the coach stepped away from the team allowing a different coach to take over then maybe this is a different team than the one the OP alluded to? The OP made it sound as if the coach is still there and planning to stay next season. Are you and OP speaking about the same coach? I can accept a coach leaving a team mid-season if things were not working out more than I can accept the coach remaining there, bemoaning his lack of talent (in front of the players) and then sulking and not trying to coach during the games (or practices). Need some clarity as to whether this is the same team (many AFU teams are low on the table but only one is 2-14, now 2-15-1).
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Post by DunwoodySoccerDad on Nov 22, 2021 15:02:26 GMT -5
That team was 2-14. As I heard it the coach felt the team wasn't listening to him and decided it would be best for the team if he stepped away. TBH the answer is quite simply the talent. IMO the only way AFU becomes actually competitive is to pay more for top coaches and comp the fees for players they recruit from other clubs. Aside from that, nothing changes anytime soon. If the coach stepped away from the team allowing a different coach to take over then maybe this is a different team than the one the OP alluded to? The OP made it sound as if the coach is still there and planning to stay next season. Are you and OP speaking about the same coach? I can accept a coach leaving a team mid-season if things were not working out more than I can accept the coach remaining there, bemoaning his lack of talent (in front of the players) and then sulking and not trying to coach during the games (or practices). Need some clarity as to whether this is the same team (many AFU teams are low on the table but only one is 2-14, now 2-15-1). atlfutboldad is referring to the AFU team, not the OP's team.
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Post by atlbuster on Nov 22, 2021 15:03:42 GMT -5
This coach is still there - has not walked away. And this is not a matter of kids not working on their own or an attempt at shifting blame. It is reasonable to expect progression and growth over the course of a season - that’s table stakes for decent coaching at the highest levels. Even if the W/L column doesn’t reflect it, if a team progresses, tactically and skill-wise, over a season, it can be a successful season. But where a team is no better at the end of the season than they were at the start, and has even perhaps regressed, that is an objective coaching fail, at least in part. And guess what - sometimes that happens. Every season isn’t great. But where it crosses the line is when the adult elects not to own it, and solely blames the players that he selected, and he coached, rather than accepting that he may not have done a good job, or may in fact be in over his head.
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Post by oraclesfriend on Nov 22, 2021 15:35:54 GMT -5
I wonder if surveys would help the clubs. Anonymous of course. At high school ages they could go to both parents and kids. There are ways to word it that would get some balanced info. For example we currently have a coach who is not liked much by the players and parents. Interestingly last year most were neutral on him to slightly positive. Regardless if you asked the parents to mention something positive about the coach everyone could come up with something positive to say despite the overwhelming negative stuff. It would be even more interesting to compare from year to year and team to team. Sometimes I think the coaches get burned out on a certain team. They have been under lots of stress this year + too. They might not even realize some of the jerky things they are doing.
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Post by soccernoleuk on Nov 22, 2021 16:14:52 GMT -5
The AFU situation this year is totally different than last year. Not only is it a different age group, with different parents, but it was actually not even his decision to walk away this year. He approached club leadership and told them he wasn't planning on returning next year. Leadership then made the decision to have him give up his ECNL team now instead of dragging it out through the remainder of the year.
I know this version isn't as "juicy" as "another AFU coach quits team", but the 2 situations are like comparing apples to oranges.
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Post by Futsal Gawdess on Nov 22, 2021 22:15:24 GMT -5
I have always viewed the world of sports much like I would the world of education. For success, a child has to get support from their teacher, their tutor, their parents and honestly the climate of learning aka the school. Win/lose/draw if a student doesn't perform we lay it at the feet of the teachers, but we all know the whole village let that child down. Crossing over to the sports side of things, in this case soccer, I think the blame or praise for the success of a player/team should also go around. Yes we may have meddling parents, money grabbing private trainers, less than stellar coaching and in some cases an environment of winning or losing. I have heard a mixed bag about the root-cause of their current status, in regards to the team being talked about. However, it is not for a lack of trying, training or parent involvement. Sometimes it is just the coach or the environment that leads to lackluster results. Thankfully, for the young ladies on that team, the coach that is taking over is a pretty good, well known, well respected and experienced coach. Let's hope he's able to galvanize the team and stop the bleeding...
Side Note: Two things raise alarms for me. First this is the second coach in 2 years who has also decided to leave. I would think the leadership would be worried that this doesn't become a trend and are able to realize and offer support earlier to these coaches before they feel the need to leave. Secondly, did the outgoing coach come from UFA (name rings a bell) but didn't he also choose to leave a team at UFA-N too? Finally, what ever became of the coach who quit last year, is he still coaching and if so where?
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Post by coffee on Nov 23, 2021 0:44:29 GMT -5
Edit: meant to quote both of these comments, because they are both spot-on. The AFU situation this year is totally different than last year. Not only is it a different age group, with different parents, but it was actually not even his decision to walk away this year. He approached club leadership and told them he wasn't planning on returning next year. Leadership then made the decision to have him give up his ECNL team now instead of dragging it out through the remainder of the year. I know this version isn't as "juicy" as "another AFU coach quits team", but the 2 situations are like comparing apples to oranges. This is correct. You apparently don’t have an axe to grind. …Thankfully, for the young ladies on that team, the coach that is taking over is a pretty good, well known, well respected and experienced coach. Let's hope he's able to galvanize the team and stop the bleeding... Full marks. Nailed it in one.
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Post by Futsal Gawdess on Nov 23, 2021 20:58:47 GMT -5
atlfutboldad thanks for the insight. With all that you know or may have seen with this team and the club as a whole, where do you think the crux of the issue lies? Is it coaching, players, players mindset, club mindset, leadership? I would think with the team trending downwards year after year after year MM should have stepped in to help steer it back on track or just taken over the team as you suggested. IMO I just don't see an identity with AFU. It always seems to me like they are a club who are like a fish out of water, just a little outside their element and the results are shown in their standings. I am not trying to down the players, parents or their efforts but I do think it starts with the leadership. Get better coaches, put in place a 3/5/7 year plan to ensure the long term success of the teams. Have a staff that works together and for the love of all things holy stop the revolving door of ECNL coaches wanting to quit...
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Post by SoccerFirst on Nov 24, 2021 16:45:17 GMT -5
atlfutboldad thanks for the insight. With all that you know or may have seen with this team and the club as a whole, where do you think the crux of the issue lies? Is it coaching, players, players mindset, club mindset, leadership? I would think with the team trending downwards year after year after year MM should have stepped in to help steer it back on track or just taken over the team as you suggested. IMO I just don't see an identity with AFU. It always seems to me like they are a club who are like a fish out of water, just a little outside their element and the results are shown in their standings. I am not trying to down the players, parents or their efforts but I do think it starts with the leadership. Get better coaches, put in place a 3/5/7 year plan to ensure the long term success of the teams. Have a staff that works together and for the love of all things holy stop the revolving door of ECNL coaches wanting to quit... Just stating facts, I’ll allow you to form your own opinion, but they lost 4 female Academy/Select coaches last year and they voted off 3 BOD members in the past calendar year.
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Post by atlfutboldad on Nov 24, 2021 17:55:54 GMT -5
JMO of course...
The only way to fix the problem is to win. Winning == positive perception. The only way for AFU to win is to get better players. They need to get better (former professionals IMO) first-team coaches (pay more $) and then offer non-needs based fees compensation to players you want to recruit from other clubs. All it takes is 2-3 players per team to turn things around. I really don't know if this is possible with the current bylaws. So basically they have to out-GSA GSA at that game.
I look at AFU like the Tennesee football program at the moment. The only way to get better is to recruit better players. They did have to get the last of the Hooverites off the board as part of the work.
The last thing I think is important is to move to better possession-style soccer rather than the run-and-gun approach. IMO Concorde, Tophat and UFA all play better possession soccer than AFU or GSA. You're not going to get many national-level players with that approach.
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Post by Futsal Gawdess on Nov 24, 2021 18:37:19 GMT -5
atlfutboldad thanks for the insight. With all that you know or may have seen with this team and the club as a whole, where do you think the crux of the issue lies? Is it coaching, players, players mindset, club mindset, leadership? I would think with the team trending downwards year after year after year MM should have stepped in to help steer it back on track or just taken over the team as you suggested. IMO I just don't see an identity with AFU. It always seems to me like they are a club who are like a fish out of water, just a little outside their element and the results are shown in their standings. I am not trying to down the players, parents or their efforts but I do think it starts with the leadership. Get better coaches, put in place a 3/5/7 year plan to ensure the long term success of the teams. Have a staff that works together and for the love of all things holy stop the revolving door of ECNL coaches wanting to quit... Just stating facts, I’ll allow you to form your own opinion, but they lost 4 female Academy/Select coaches last year and they voted off 3 BOD members in the past calendar year. Guessing BOD members are board members. I'm curious why they were voted off, where they remnants or stalwarts of the vacuum cleaner's reign? If, so the question is, now that the malignant board members are gone, how has the MM reign been since he took over for the vacuum cleaner? Is he being controlled by the board or are his suggestions or needs not being met? He has an experienced lieutenant in Garth, who btw I believe is on the ECNL Board. To me, it seems like someone has to take the reins and steer the club in the right direction and do what's best for the club and the players. I know Coach Nadine is not coaching this year, sad to hear they lost more academy/select female coaches. Is this a club trend or are they leaving for lack of leadership/mentorship/opportunity? You would think with AFU being in the ECNL and the wealth of players around their location they should be able to sell players on the merits of the club, especially those who bypass them to go to UFA/Premier or GAL with TH/SSA/AFU to stay. Honestly, based on comments posted here, I would say first and foremost, they need a chief marketing coach/staff to sell players on the merits of AFU. Right off the top of my head, don't they have the only on-staff recruitment coach who used to coach D1 and knows the landscape and coaches out there. That alone should be a selling point IMO. I wish the club, players and parents well and hope they can get out of this dark period they are in and hope they can come out on the other side of this...🤞⚽🤞
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Post by Futsal Gawdess on Nov 24, 2021 18:40:03 GMT -5
JMO of course... The only way to fix the problem is to win. Winning == positive perception. The only way for AFU to win is to get better players. They need to get better (former professionals IMO) first-team coaches (pay more $) and then offer non-needs based fees compensation to players you want to recruit from other clubs. All it takes is 2-3 players per team to turn things around. I really don't know if this is possible with the current bylaws. So basically they have to out-GSA GSA at that game. I look at AFU like the Tennesee football program at the moment. The only way to get better is to recruit better players. They did have to get the last of the Hooverites off the board as part of the work. The last thing I think is important is to move to better possession-style soccer rather than the run-and-gun approach. IMO Concorde, Tophat and UFA all play better possession soccer than AFU or GSA. You're not going to get many national-level players with that approach. I know at UFA our club philosophy on playing was replicated across the club. Mo or Roberto set the tone for the entire boys/girls program. Is this being done at AFU or is it a hodgepodge of formations and playing philosophy based on the specific coaches?
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Post by atlfutboldad on Nov 24, 2021 20:15:59 GMT -5
AFU's strategy is to build out of the back into and then go on the fast attack/long-ball into the final 3rd. I'm pretty sure that's uniform across the club. Seems like the same strategy as GSA. Really there's not much focus on possessing in the attacking 3rd and setting up opportunities.
Frankly so many wasted attacks putting the ball to the 9 with 3-4 defenders on their back, a couple times a game it works though. I think this is an academy strategy that is hard to break.
IMO high-level GK coaching should be a priority for the club.
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Post by kidsocceruber on Nov 24, 2021 21:18:05 GMT -5
AFU's strategy is to build out of the back into and then go on the fast attack/long-ball into the final 3rd. I'm pretty sure that's uniform across the club. Seems like the same strategy as GSA. Really there's not much focus on possessing in the attacking 3rd and setting up opportunities. Frankly so many wasted attacks putting the ball to the 9 with 3-4 defenders on their back, a couple times a game it works though. I think this is an academy strategy that is hard to break. IMO high-level GK coaching should be a priority for the club. It's hard to say goalkeeping or defense is a problem when you're playing to win 1-0 every game. Our (AFU) ECRL team played in the Raleigh showcase this weekend, and pretty much this was what happened against 2 ECNL and one GA team. 2-0 L, 1-0 L, 0-0 T. It was evident from the get go that the other team would be controlling the midfield and building an attack. We were on defense the majority of the game and barely got off any shots in 3 games so if (or when) the defense gets beat or slips up once or the keeper isn't standing on her head for 90(80 for the tournament) minutes it's just game over. These girls are good players, but if they're not beating 2 or 3 defenders by themselves they're not scoring.
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Post by flix on Nov 25, 2021 7:14:02 GMT -5
I may different because parents have to take some ownership in that also. You don’t end up in the bottom third of the table by accident or because you don’t have a good coach. Football and basketball are all about coaches designing plays and players executing them. Soccer is the one sport where players basically control the game. There may be some joystick coaches out there but for the most part the game is played by the players. So if your players individually aren’t better than the opponent, than chances are likely that you will lose. Soccer is full of parents who like to shift the blame to the coach instead of maybe working with your own kid from time to time. Parents always blame coaches and wonder where all the good ones have gone, they went somewhere else to make easier money than dealing with parents always wanting to chat endlessly about their kid. If these coaches are so horrible, then why don’t you go get your coaching badges and make a difference instead of whining? You assume that the kids are not working on their own. Most kids on ECNL/ECRL/GA/DPL are all working on their own or with trainers or both. Plus it is not that the coach is bad because they are in the bottom of the table. It is that the coach is bad because he is an a**hole if he is saying crap like "I can't wait for tryouts." The players may control the outcome, but the coach is responsible for nurturing the talent and teaching tactics. Also if this happened at school by a teacher everyone would be outraged. Let's say a teacher called your kid "stupid" to their face. A coach is a teacher of a game. You CANNOT act like a jerk! Push the players. Point out mistakes. Tell them what skills they need to work on. But don't tell them they are stupid or that you are embarrassed by them or that you can't wait for tryouts to get a new set of players. I am not assuming they are not working on their own, it could just be they are not that good. No matter how hard I work on my ice skating skills and puck skills, I am not going to be a great hockey player, even if Wayne Gretzky was my coach. So far as the coach being an a**hole, that’s life. Everyone has different personalities. Some cool cops, some a**holes, same with everything else. You can’t not be a nice person and still be good at your job. And as to the point about the coach saying he can’t wait for tryouts, at AU boys hear that kind of talk frequently. They even have kids come in practicing with them to take their spots. It’s supposed to motivate you but there are so many soft people in the world now that’s it’s taken as an attack on my child. I do seem to notice a lot of the coach complaints are from girls teams, not boys. I think a lot of parents are delusional. It does not help clubs have 18 teams per age group to make everyone feel they are an elite player just because you can pay the fees. I think coaches can teach in whatever fashion they believe will be effective, if you don’t like it as a parent kick rocks and go train your own kid if you are so smart. A lot of parents are too lazy to learn anything and just pay someone to them complain about the job they are doing. The best teachers I ever had, were the ones that insulted me and aggravated me. Only later did I realize that but I was lucky enough to to be able to have a conversation with said teacher many years after high school to thank him. I really can’t believe you put ECRL on that list either.
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Post by oraclesfriend on Nov 25, 2021 10:42:30 GMT -5
You assume that the kids are not working on their own. Most kids on ECNL/ECRL/GA/DPL are all working on their own or with trainers or both. Plus it is not that the coach is bad because they are in the bottom of the table. It is that the coach is bad because he is an a**hole if he is saying crap like "I can't wait for tryouts." The players may control the outcome, but the coach is responsible for nurturing the talent and teaching tactics. Also if this happened at school by a teacher everyone would be outraged. Let's say a teacher called your kid "stupid" to their face. A coach is a teacher of a game. You CANNOT act like a jerk! Push the players. Point out mistakes. Tell them what skills they need to work on. But don't tell them they are stupid or that you are embarrassed by them or that you can't wait for tryouts to get a new set of players. I am not assuming they are not working on their own, it could just be they are not that good. No matter how hard I work on my ice skating skills and puck skills, I am not going to be a great hockey player, even if Wayne Gretzky was my coach. So far as the coach being an a**hole, that’s life. Everyone has different personalities. Some cool cops, some a**holes, same with everything else. You can’t not be a nice person and still be good at your job. And as to the point about the coach saying he can’t wait for tryouts, at AU boys hear that kind of talk frequently. They even have kids come in practicing with them to take their spots. It’s supposed to motivate you but there are so many soft people in the world now that’s it’s taken as an attack on my child. I do seem to notice a lot of the coach complaints are from girls teams, not boys. I think a lot of parents are delusional. It does not help clubs have 18 teams per age group to make everyone feel they are an elite player just because you can pay the fees. I think coaches can teach in whatever fashion they believe will be effective, if you don’t like it as a parent kick rocks and go train your own kid if you are so smart. A lot of parents are too lazy to learn anything and just pay someone to them complain about the job they are doing. The best teachers I ever had, were the ones that insulted me and aggravated me. Only later did I realize that but I was lucky enough to to be able to have a conversation with said teacher many years after high school to thank him. I really can’t believe you put ECRL on that list either. I put ECRL on there because I don't want to put down players or teams due to a league. Last year several ECRL teams beat ECNL teams in the end of the season ECNL Cups. I don't feel like a blanket statement based on a league is appropriate. There are good players in all leagues. The best athletes, students and workers don't need to be insulted to be motivated. They are self motivated. Personally I don't care what AU does to motivate their players. Having players trying out on a regular basis is a good thing because it lets people know that they have to work to keep their spot, but continually telling people that you can't wait to get rid of them is not helpful. The best soccer players play best when they are confident, not when they are afraid. Many coaches are converting to be more positive. There may be something to your comment about boys vs girls. I remember being insulted when Anson Dorrance said you have to coach girls differently than boys. But if you have been paying attention at all to the NWSL issues you will see that many of these coaches being accused of verbal and emotional abuse are also coaches of youth teams or directors of youth clubs with many complaints there as well. I am not saying this coach was being abusive but these coaches need to be careful that what they say does not cross lines. Studies on Pat Summit show that praise (14%) was used a lot more than scold (7%). Instruction was used the most (close to 50%). The example of the scold was to tell a player to "mark that down as a sprint, that was unacceptable." www.researchgate.net/publication/289213530_Effective_Coaching_in_Action_Observations_of_Legendary_Collegiate_Basketball_Coach_Pat_Summitt
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Post by flix on Nov 29, 2021 8:54:28 GMT -5
I am not assuming they are not working on their own, it could just be they are not that good. No matter how hard I work on my ice skating skills and puck skills, I am not going to be a great hockey player, even if Wayne Gretzky was my coach. So far as the coach being an a**hole, that’s life. Everyone has different personalities. Some cool cops, some a**holes, same with everything else. You can’t not be a nice person and still be good at your job. And as to the point about the coach saying he can’t wait for tryouts, at AU boys hear that kind of talk frequently. They even have kids come in practicing with them to take their spots. It’s supposed to motivate you but there are so many soft people in the world now that’s it’s taken as an attack on my child. I do seem to notice a lot of the coach complaints are from girls teams, not boys. I think a lot of parents are delusional. It does not help clubs have 18 teams per age group to make everyone feel they are an elite player just because you can pay the fees. I think coaches can teach in whatever fashion they believe will be effective, if you don’t like it as a parent kick rocks and go train your own kid if you are so smart. A lot of parents are too lazy to learn anything and just pay someone to them complain about the job they are doing. The best teachers I ever had, were the ones that insulted me and aggravated me. Only later did I realize that but I was lucky enough to to be able to have a conversation with said teacher many years after high school to thank him. I really can’t believe you put ECRL on that list either. I put ECRL on there because I don't want to put down players or teams due to a league. Last year several ECRL teams beat ECNL teams in the end of the season ECNL Cups. I don't feel like a blanket statement based on a league is appropriate. There are good players in all leagues. The best athletes, students and workers don't need to be insulted to be motivated. They are self motivated. Personally I don't care what AU does to motivate their players. Having players trying out on a regular basis is a good thing because it lets people know that they have to work to keep their spot, but continually telling people that you can't wait to get rid of them is not helpful. The best soccer players play best when they are confident, not when they are afraid. Many coaches are converting to be more positive. There may be something to your comment about boys vs girls. I remember being insulted when Anson Dorrance said you have to coach girls differently than boys. But if you have been paying attention at all to the NWSL issues you will see that many of these coaches being accused of verbal and emotional abuse are also coaches of youth teams or directors of youth clubs with many complaints there as well. I am not saying this coach was being abusive but these coaches need to be careful that what they say does not cross lines. Studies on Pat Summit show that praise (14%) was used a lot more than scold (7%). Instruction was used the most (close to 50%). The example of the scold was to tell a player to "mark that down as a sprint, that was unacceptable." www.researchgate.net/publication/289213530_Effective_Coaching_in_Action_Observations_of_Legendary_Collegiate_Basketball_Coach_Pat_SummittHow does a coach saying he can’t wait for tryouts morph into continually telling people he can’t wait to get rid of people? The best soccer players don’t need to be insulted to be motivated? ?? What are you talking about? You were insulted because someone said you have to coach girls different than boys? Not surprised by that bombshell but it’s reality. Pat Summitt..... my favorite basketball coach (men or women) was very very good back when I was growing up. Had a lot of very good teams in the 80’s to mid 90’s....... then an a**hole dude showed up in Storrs and ever since then the best players have gone to UConn. Some people need different kinds of motivation. I would bet you a million dollars Geno isn’t holding hands and blowing bubbles.
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Post by atlbuster on Nov 29, 2021 11:15:19 GMT -5
An a**hole good coach is completely different than an a**hole bad coach. We understand the difference between the two, as my daughter came up through the TH academy program. Some on this board would say that many coaches in that program fall into the former category, but we dealt with all of the nonsense without complaint because of the results and the training, and we’d do it again in a heartbeat. Now, we are enduring the latter, but apparently taking issue with it - primarily the fact that the coach doesn’t own it - apparently makes me, and others who might share my view on a**hole bad coaches, lazy, stupid, soft, and delusional. Perhaps those insults are intended as a means of motivation? At the end of the day it doesn’t matter. We’re going to vote with our feet and move on after the season. Life is too short, and participation too expensive, to waste time on a situation where the effort and investment is only one-way.
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Post by footyfan on Nov 29, 2021 13:36:50 GMT -5
An a**hole good coach is completely different than an a**hole bad coach. We understand the difference between the two, as my daughter came up through the TH academy program. Some on this board would say that many coaches in that program fall into the former category, but we dealt with all of the nonsense without complaint because of the results and the training, and we’d do it again in a heartbeat. Now, we are enduring the latter, but apparently taking issue with it - primarily the fact that the coach doesn’t own it - apparently makes me, and others who might share my view on a**hole bad coaches, lazy, stupid, soft, and delusional. Perhaps those insults are intended as a means of motivation? At the end of the day it doesn’t matter. We’re going to vote with our feet and move on after the season. Life is too short, and participation too expensive, to waste time on a situation where the effort and investment is only one-way. Perhaps the line between ahole-good-coaches and ahole-bad-coaches is a fine enough one that we should adjust the manners of all of them. If you can't be a good coach without being an ahole, you aren't a good person, and that should matter. If soccer is supposed to teach life lessons, aren't we setting our children up for tolerating abuse in college, work, and their personal lives if we show them they should accept it from a youth coach?
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