Post by SoccerMom on Apr 8, 2015 12:20:48 GMT -5
Sometimes here on The 91st we like to dip back into the bubbling vat of the past to melt off all the skin on our limbs in the acid of the terrible. Was that too hyperbolic? Nah. Probably not.
In any case, this comes to us from the Brazilian second division, which is not very good. The goal was credited to Avai in an eventual 2-0 win over Boa Esporte last September, but let’s tell it straight here. Nobody won in this scenario. Life lost.
There’s such a dizzying array of failures from Boa Esporte in this video. First, a Boa Esporte player completely whiffs on a slow, chest-level header without an opposing player within 15 feet of him in any direction. His teammate then tries to rifle a ball back into the box (it was very clearly not to anyone in particular and was almost certainly headed over the crossbar), but it smacks an opposing player in the face and ricochets back to start the break. Mmkay.
Avai quickly builds and rolls up on Boa Morte (do you see what I did there) like a phalanx advancing on an unaware village. Boa Esporte didn’t bother reorganizing any kind of defense, while you can practically see Avai’s perfectly spaced four-across attack sharpening its knives on the bones of its enemies.
But what happens next is the real moment of awful clarity. The ball is served in, and it’s a relatively weak one. The keeper clearly has enough time to charge out and either parry it well out of danger or simply grab it for himself. He does neither, whiffing on it completely as it falls to an Avai attacker, alone.
The shot comes in with the keeper slowly peeling himself off the turf, but there’s a defender on the back line. Saved. Or not! The defender tries to clear, but the ball caroms off the face of our poor keeper, who’s staggering back to his line to try to do… something. Instead the ball smashes into the back netting off his head. Sadness immediately reigns supreme.
To recap: two served balls off faces, a keeper whiff, a header whiff and U8 defending. It’s the Mona Lisa of failing and we should never forget this exists.
www.topdrawersoccer.com/the91stminute/2015/04/we-found-the-greatest-bad-soccer-sequence-ever-and-its-in-brazil/?utm_source=TopDrawerSoccer+Newsletter&utm_campaign=bb7cc3535d-General_4_8_154_8_2015&utm_medium=email&utm_term=0_8340315a79-bb7cc3535d-31403341
