Soccer Journey (no politics!)
Jun 29, 2020 10:55:35 GMT -5
rifle, Keeperkeeper, and 15 more like this
Post by guest on Jun 29, 2020 10:55:35 GMT -5
Hello Forumites, Long Post Advisory:
I have been a bit delayed in writing this post. I don't know why, it's not like anything else has been going on in the world lately :-) As my daughter is transitioning out of youth soccer and into college, this is my attempt to recap her journey.
I remember when we went to the park to sign her up for sports as a 4 yr old. There was a sign at the field entrance that said tee-ball this way and soccer that way. We chose soccer, I think because the line looked shorter. Little did we realize where that choice would lead us. Of course we get the the point where the club says we need more Rec coaches and your child may not get to play if we don't get more signups. So I did, not really knowing much about soccer. I coached her Rec teams for a few years and got to spend great quality time with her. Just as much as she learned how to play soccer, I learned how to be a coach. Both of us will agree to that old saying, it is hard to be the coach's kid.
Then came time for Academy. She started off as a bench sitter on the bottom of three teams. Tues practice included drills, but Thurs practice was virtually all scrimmaging. She got hardly any playing time (as a 9 yr old?!?) either at Thurs practice or Sat games. Finally I had enough and spoke to the coach. He said quite honestly and I will never forget this, "it wouldn't be fair to all the good players to play your daughter". Before I could talk to the DOC about how this attitude was opposite the club's purported vision of equal playing time, he quit. The new DOC said that coach would not be back and things would change. It took one season, but they did.
Now is where it gets good. She is now getting good minutes both at practice and at games. She is improving dramatically! She always set goals, small achievable goals. First was I want to be a starter. Then I want to get called up to the second team. Then a starter on the second team and so on. We finally get to Select. She did not make the top team as she had hoped. But she had worked herself in to the top spot on the second team. One day the call came in, one of the top team players got hurt. He asked our coach who was the 'next one up' and it was my daughter. Wow, top team. she played defense and this coach did not like to sub out the defenders much so she was getting great time on the top team. I remember in one of her first games she took a free kick. The normal kick taker was off the field at the time. Teammates all posted up on the 18 ready to crash in for the header or volley. She took the kick and drilled it in the upper corner. Wow you want to talk about pride, hearing the other parents say 'hey who was that, she's got a great leg'. Now we're 'part of the team', going to all the tourneys and games, going to state cup and final four. She was part of our clubs first ever R3PL team. She tried out and made ODP. That was a big deal, not the least of it for the soccer but for overcoming the fear of trying out and playing with some really good players. Started on her HS team as a freshman.
Then we had several years of big changes. First the birth year mandate. Not able to field enough 02s so we had to mix with 03s. Then our club merged, first with separate North and South branches. Then SCCL replaced R3PL. I remember asking the DOC what about R3PL or State Cup, he said it has become irrelevant now (maybe not then but certainly now). Then our North and South teams merged. Then finally last year she made her club's ECNL composite team, who was on track to make ECNL Finals for the second year.
While she was on the SCCL team, she started on the college recruiting journey. ID camps, writing letters, visiting with coaches at tournaments, etc. She was able to clarify her career and school path, which opened up her college options to some smaller schools. Beforehand, she wanted to go to a big school even if it meant no soccer. Went on a few visits to D2 and NAIA schools in GA/FL/SC. She chose one that gave her a good offer but more importantly loved the campus, coach and team. Mom and Dad were All-Conference and All-American at big D1 SEC schools. If you asked us when she was 10, we would never imagine she would be playing in college. Never. But it is truly amazing what happens if you keep at it.
In conclusion (boy I bet you are glad we are at the end) we learned a lot of great lessons. Never Give Up! A bench sitter at age 10 might go on to play whistle to whistle by the time they get HS age. Set small, achievable goals and when you make one, immediately set another. I want to get minutes on my team. I want to get called up to the top team. I want to take all the kicks. I want to play at ECNL events. And for the parents: enjoy the ride. Nothing is ever as bad as it seems. Your kid blows it and gives up the game-winning goal and now you have to drive home. Best advice I ever got was to not to give pointers (read: criticism) on the car ride home. If you have nothing good to say, say "I love watching you play soccer!". It sounds cheesy and after a while she picked up on what it really meant. But she at least appreciated the lack of 'you should have done this, you should have done that' all the way home.
Now I have one in college soccer, one playing other sports (he was too rough for association football) and my last one will probably play Rec his whole career. And that is fine with me.
Cheers,
Guest
I have been a bit delayed in writing this post. I don't know why, it's not like anything else has been going on in the world lately :-) As my daughter is transitioning out of youth soccer and into college, this is my attempt to recap her journey.
I remember when we went to the park to sign her up for sports as a 4 yr old. There was a sign at the field entrance that said tee-ball this way and soccer that way. We chose soccer, I think because the line looked shorter. Little did we realize where that choice would lead us. Of course we get the the point where the club says we need more Rec coaches and your child may not get to play if we don't get more signups. So I did, not really knowing much about soccer. I coached her Rec teams for a few years and got to spend great quality time with her. Just as much as she learned how to play soccer, I learned how to be a coach. Both of us will agree to that old saying, it is hard to be the coach's kid.
Then came time for Academy. She started off as a bench sitter on the bottom of three teams. Tues practice included drills, but Thurs practice was virtually all scrimmaging. She got hardly any playing time (as a 9 yr old?!?) either at Thurs practice or Sat games. Finally I had enough and spoke to the coach. He said quite honestly and I will never forget this, "it wouldn't be fair to all the good players to play your daughter". Before I could talk to the DOC about how this attitude was opposite the club's purported vision of equal playing time, he quit. The new DOC said that coach would not be back and things would change. It took one season, but they did.
Now is where it gets good. She is now getting good minutes both at practice and at games. She is improving dramatically! She always set goals, small achievable goals. First was I want to be a starter. Then I want to get called up to the second team. Then a starter on the second team and so on. We finally get to Select. She did not make the top team as she had hoped. But she had worked herself in to the top spot on the second team. One day the call came in, one of the top team players got hurt. He asked our coach who was the 'next one up' and it was my daughter. Wow, top team. she played defense and this coach did not like to sub out the defenders much so she was getting great time on the top team. I remember in one of her first games she took a free kick. The normal kick taker was off the field at the time. Teammates all posted up on the 18 ready to crash in for the header or volley. She took the kick and drilled it in the upper corner. Wow you want to talk about pride, hearing the other parents say 'hey who was that, she's got a great leg'. Now we're 'part of the team', going to all the tourneys and games, going to state cup and final four. She was part of our clubs first ever R3PL team. She tried out and made ODP. That was a big deal, not the least of it for the soccer but for overcoming the fear of trying out and playing with some really good players. Started on her HS team as a freshman.
Then we had several years of big changes. First the birth year mandate. Not able to field enough 02s so we had to mix with 03s. Then our club merged, first with separate North and South branches. Then SCCL replaced R3PL. I remember asking the DOC what about R3PL or State Cup, he said it has become irrelevant now (maybe not then but certainly now). Then our North and South teams merged. Then finally last year she made her club's ECNL composite team, who was on track to make ECNL Finals for the second year.
While she was on the SCCL team, she started on the college recruiting journey. ID camps, writing letters, visiting with coaches at tournaments, etc. She was able to clarify her career and school path, which opened up her college options to some smaller schools. Beforehand, she wanted to go to a big school even if it meant no soccer. Went on a few visits to D2 and NAIA schools in GA/FL/SC. She chose one that gave her a good offer but more importantly loved the campus, coach and team. Mom and Dad were All-Conference and All-American at big D1 SEC schools. If you asked us when she was 10, we would never imagine she would be playing in college. Never. But it is truly amazing what happens if you keep at it.
In conclusion (boy I bet you are glad we are at the end) we learned a lot of great lessons. Never Give Up! A bench sitter at age 10 might go on to play whistle to whistle by the time they get HS age. Set small, achievable goals and when you make one, immediately set another. I want to get minutes on my team. I want to get called up to the top team. I want to take all the kicks. I want to play at ECNL events. And for the parents: enjoy the ride. Nothing is ever as bad as it seems. Your kid blows it and gives up the game-winning goal and now you have to drive home. Best advice I ever got was to not to give pointers (read: criticism) on the car ride home. If you have nothing good to say, say "I love watching you play soccer!". It sounds cheesy and after a while she picked up on what it really meant. But she at least appreciated the lack of 'you should have done this, you should have done that' all the way home.
Now I have one in college soccer, one playing other sports (he was too rough for association football) and my last one will probably play Rec his whole career. And that is fine with me.
Cheers,
Guest
