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Post by thesoccerparent on May 27, 2021 7:45:19 GMT -5
So with tryouts wrapping up this week, my son was told by his existing club (who he has played with for 7 years) that they will be calling the parents on Friday with offers and want the final decision at that time. Our dilemma is that my son has one more tryout with a second club next week. The second club is probably most son’s top choice. Our son attended the pre tryout session and was asked to come back by the coach, but we know he still has show himself at the tryout to get an offer.
Possible options:
1) Email second club coach to see how many openings are available and mention existing club forcing decision on Friday.
2) Accept offer with existing club, still attend tryout with 2nd club next week, and if he gets offer from second club then just tell existing club we got a better offer. ( Would this look really bad and not allow my son to ever return to his existing club?)
3) Go all in on second club and just tell existing club that we decline the offer. ( very risky )
Please provide any feedback or advice.
Thanks
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Post by fanatic21 on May 27, 2021 7:55:43 GMT -5
I'd let the second club coach know your delimma - that you have an offer and you are being asked to make a decision - that you are interested in his team but that you don't want your son to end up without a place to play if he is not selected. The coach may decide he doesn't want to lose your son and give him an offer based on what he saw at the pre-tryout event. You could also ask the first club if you can have until next week for a decision.
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Post by NotherSoccerParent on May 27, 2021 7:57:42 GMT -5
I would email the coach at the second club and ask for an honest assessment where he stands. Of course, everything is verbal until you get the sign up email, so there's always that risk that the coach has no integrity but that's something you will need to figure out. If your kid is good enough, then your existing club coach would probably rather give you a few more days to consider it then to risk losing him.
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Post by DunwoodySoccerDad on May 27, 2021 8:00:30 GMT -5
Man, that's tough. I look at option #1 as not really a choice - you absolutely should ask the new club about openings. Do you know who the coach will be for the team he's trying to get on? That's really who you need to talk to. Sending an email to the club itself may not land in the right hands or get the info you're looking for. Anyway, if you can get a hold of the coach, he might be upfront with you about your son's chances of getting a spot, which would help you decide whether you should choose option 2 or 3.
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Post by mightydawg on May 27, 2021 8:02:12 GMT -5
I would definitely not go with option 2. Accepting a spot and backing out burns a bridge with the coach for sure and possibly the club. This goes for both players and coaches--if you give your word to someone, you ought to keep it.
The real question is what kind of leverage do you have. Are you being offered a spot at the same level of play between the two clubs or is the second club a higher level team?
If you have leverage, I would reach out to the 2nd club (that is first choice) and tell them the situation. They will either tell you that he has an offer or he doesn't. If he doesn't, then your son has to make a decision about his top priority.
Also, if you go all in with the 2nd club, what are his options if he does not make the team that he wants? Do they have a lower team that he would be happy playing on?
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Post by thesoccerparent on May 27, 2021 8:15:19 GMT -5
Thanks so much for the quick feedback. Email already sent to 2nd club coach explaining dilemma. The move to the new club is at the same level as the existing club. However the second club has a new coach and my sons existing club is moving up a level this year to the same level as the second. We are just not sure how much leverage we have with the existing or second club if they really want our son. And yes, we really don’t have a 3rd option if this don’t work out with the 2 clubs.
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Post by southsoccerfam on May 27, 2021 8:27:15 GMT -5
Can't you be straight up with your current club coach and when they call you on Friday with the offer tell them that you need a few days to decide ?
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Post by bolo on May 27, 2021 9:17:40 GMT -5
Thanks so much for the quick feedback. Email already sent to 2nd club coach explaining dilemma. The move to the new club is at the same level as the existing club. However the second club has a new coach and my sons existing club is moving up a level this year to the same level as the second. We are just not sure how much leverage we have with the existing or second club if they really want our son. And yes, we really don’t have a 3rd option if this don’t work out with the 2 clubs. Out of curiosity, is the tryout next week some sort of "additional" tryout? Not sure how old your son is but aren't all of the tryouts for rising U14 & below this week, and U15 & above next week? Or maybe he is U15 or older and his current club is making offers to existing players before official tryouts next week. Sorry, just trying to understand the logistics in play here. Agree with what you have done so far regardless. |
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Post by soccerpeeps on May 27, 2021 9:19:16 GMT -5
First, you've been with a club for seven years and they are pressuring you into a quick decision is ridiculous.
Second, Just don't answer the phone until you are ready to make a decision.
As a parent think about how you would handle this situation if these were job offers for you. If someone tried to pressure you into taking a job is that really the kind of company you ant to work for? I Know that things are crazy for us all during this time but it really ticks me off that we pay good money to get pressured into making quick decisions for our kids and our money, without all the facts . So sorry you have to deal with this but the Best of luck to you!
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Post by georgiasoccerdad on May 27, 2021 9:30:17 GMT -5
First, you've been with a club for seven years and they are pressuring you into a quick decision is ridiculous. Second, Just don't answer the phone until you are ready to make a decision. As a parent think about how you would handle this situation if these were job offers for you. If someone tried to pressure you into taking a job is that really the kind of company you ant to work for? I Know that things are crazy for us all during this time but it really ticks me off that we pay good money to get pressured into making quick decisions for our kids and our money, without all the facts . So sorry you have to deal with this but the Best of luck to you! Do you know of any other business that puts pressure like this on long term customers? Why on earth do we accept it when it's our kids? Not dogging the poster here- this is a club issue and needs to be corrected because it smells of desperation masked as dominance. |
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Post by thesoccerparent on May 27, 2021 9:36:09 GMT -5
Yeah for whatever this 2nd club has their team tryouts next week instead of this week like all the major clubs. I thought this would nice to have non-conflicting tryouts but of course it didn’t work out that way. It is just sad that I am not looking forward to the offer call with all the unknowns from the second club. Hopefully second club coach responds before we get the call, otherwise it might be a bad sign if he doesn’t. These big clubs don’t care how long you have been there as long as they can get another payment from another player.
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Post by bogan on May 27, 2021 9:37:49 GMT -5
“ Do you know of any other business that puts pressure like this…”
Maybe the timeshare industry?🤔😉
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Post by Goalkeeper Dad on May 27, 2021 9:55:07 GMT -5
“ Do you know of any other business that puts pressure like this…” Maybe the timeshare industry?🤔😉 Used car dealership |
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Post by guest206 on May 27, 2021 9:59:08 GMT -5
“ Do you know of any other business that puts pressure like this…” Maybe the timeshare industry?🤔😉 Barbie on 14th/North Ave |
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Post by soccerpeeps on May 27, 2021 9:59:57 GMT -5
“ Do you know of any other business that puts pressure like this…” Maybe the timeshare industry?🤔😉 |
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Post by soccerpeeps on May 27, 2021 10:01:42 GMT -5
“ Do you know of any other business that puts pressure like this…” Maybe the timeshare industry?🤔😉 They do, and we walk away!  At least I do! |
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Post by mightydawg on May 27, 2021 10:05:23 GMT -5
During my time in youth soccer, I have learned two important lessons (1) There is no loyalty from clubs to players; and (2) once your kid gets identified as a 2nd, 3rd, 4th team player at a club, it is extremely difficult to move up within the club no matter how much your player has improved. As a general rule, clubs fall into one of two buckets: (1) string current kids at the club along with little to no information to force kids to tryouts (for all 3 or 4 days) to see if better players from outside the club come along or (2) force current kids to make a decision on the club before tryouts so that they can't go to another club. You need to understand this and develop a plan.
In order to combat this, you need to create options for your child to take the power away from the clubs. In order to do that, you need to remember that tryouts actual start on May 1st (actually in mid to late April this year). Start doing your work May 1st. If you show up at scheduled tryouts without putting in the work before hand, you are making a choice to give the club all of the power.
Helping your kid to take control of their soccer journey is the way to take power back from the clubs. My kids are not first team players. This year both of my kids had multiple offers to play at the level where they wanted to play before scheduled tryouts started. All they had to do was to pick between their options. It has taken the stress completely out of tryouts.
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Post by atlsoccer on May 27, 2021 10:57:24 GMT -5
I agree with a lot of what has been said, but remember most clubs let individual coaches choose teams, so loyalty falls to them more so than the club. Some, is actually dependent on that players efforts to improve to case of moving up, along with their previous coaches recommendation and push to help, which is generally not personally in that coaches own interested. But remember, those same high pressure sales coaches could lose players by waiting another week, which could cause the players taken for that team to have a worse season/experience through the year. One player shouldn’t be a big deal, but imagine if it was 4-6 players or even more.. It could really end up holding an entire age group hostage. But at the end of the day, if you child would be in the type half of that team, most coaches would wait I think. I’m not saying who is right and who is wrong, just that there are usually two sides to these types of things and I’ve only seen one of them shared so far. I am sure there are some coaches on here that could share the similar frustration from the other side.I think mightydawg has a great point, beginning May 1 start sorting out your options and get ahead of the game. Good luck, I hope it works out for you and your child. |
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Post by thesoccerparent on May 27, 2021 13:03:24 GMT -5
This is such a joke. Heard back from 2nd club coach who thinks all the tryouts are next week even though they were this week.. He is new to team so he needs to see them play 11v11 to have an idea who will make it or not. Just sounds too risky if our son doesn’t make the 2nd club.
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Post by bogan on May 27, 2021 13:37:04 GMT -5
This is such a joke. Heard back from 2nd club coach who thinks all the tryouts are next week even though they were this week.. He is new to team so he needs to see them play 11v11 to have an idea who will make it or not. Just sounds too risky if our son doesn’t make the 2nd club. That’s a canned response (from the coach). I’m sure he was instructed to say that or something similar. |
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Post by Soccerhouse on May 27, 2021 13:50:05 GMT -5
I don't understand the tryout different, what age group are we talking here? as others have mentioned, seems odd to have the younger age group tryout next week....
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Post by flix on May 27, 2021 13:52:58 GMT -5
This is such a joke. Heard back from 2nd club coach who thinks all the tryouts are next week even though they were this week.. He is new to team so he needs to see them play 11v11 to have an idea who will make it or not. Just sounds too risky if our son doesn’t make the 2nd club. A coach does not need to see them play 11v11 to have an idea who will make it or not. You can tell from small sided games who has skill and who doesn’t. |
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Post by slickdaddy96 on May 27, 2021 13:53:36 GMT -5
That is a predicament. I would try to avoid the call from Club #1 at least till mid-week next week so you can determine if the other club is a good fit after 1-2 days of tryouts there. If they really want your kid at the 1st club they will hold his spot until they talk to you. If they don't then you know where you stood with the 1st club.
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Post by jjsoccer on May 27, 2021 13:57:50 GMT -5
I don't understand the tryout different, what age group are we talking here? as others have mentioned, seems odd to have the younger age group tryout next week.... I mentioned this in another thread. Up until this year, u14 has always tried out the 2nd week. Looks like most clubs changed u14 to the 1st week this year and a few clubs either didn’t get the memo or just stuck with tradition. |
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Post by Keeper on May 27, 2021 13:58:08 GMT -5
This is such a joke. Heard back from 2nd club coach who thinks all the tryouts are next week even though they were this week.. He is new to team so he needs to see them play 11v11 to have an idea who will make it or not. Just sounds too risky if our son doesn’t make the 2nd club. A coach does not need to see them play 11v11 to have an idea who will make it or not. You can tell from small sided games who has skill and who doesn’t. If the coach can’t coach technical and only plays boom / long ball then yeah he can only judge by seeing the big field. Either way sounds sketchy as hell. |
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Post by DunwoodySoccerDad on May 27, 2021 14:01:11 GMT -5
That is a predicament. I would try to avoid the call from Club #1 at least till mid-week next week so you can determine if the other club is a good fit after 1-2 days of tryouts there. If they really want your kid at the 1st club they will hold his spot until they talk to you. If they don't then you know where you stood with the 1st club. Avoiding it until mid-week of next week likely means you lose your spot if they start calling tomorrow. |
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Post by bogan on May 27, 2021 14:11:37 GMT -5
That is a predicament. I would try to avoid the call from Club #1 at least till mid-week next week so you can determine if the other club is a good fit after 1-2 days of tryouts there. If they really want your kid at the 1st club they will hold his spot until they talk to you. If they don't then you know where you stood with the 1st club. Avoiding it until mid-week of next week likely means you lose your spot if they start calling tomorrow. Yeah, you are pretty much stuck. |
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Post by Soccerhouse on May 27, 2021 14:20:42 GMT -5
its quite possible that club will miss out on alot of kids that tried out other places this week - being a week behind is not optimal for sure.
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Post by notcrazysoccerdad on May 27, 2021 14:31:52 GMT -5
That is a predicament. I would try to avoid the call from Club #1 at least till mid-week next week so you can determine if the other club is a good fit after 1-2 days of tryouts there. If they really want your kid at the 1st club they will hold his spot until they talk to you. If they don't then you know where you stood with the 1st club. Avoiding it until mid-week of next week likely means you lose your spot if they start calling tomorrow. We had a really fun experience a couple of years ago trying to avoid a coach's calls -- after about the 10th "missed call" it started to seem a little obvious. |
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Post by mightydawg on May 27, 2021 14:32:55 GMT -5
A coach does not need to see them play 11v11 to have an idea who will make it or not. You can tell from small sided games who has skill and who doesn’t. If the coach can’t coach technical and only plays boom / long ball then yeah he can only judge by seeing the big field. Either way sounds sketchy as hell. Exactly, if you can keep the ball and connect passes in small sided games, you will do even better at that on the bigger field with more time and space. |
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At least I do!
