Mike C

Oh lord. This thread has been there done that.
Some love coaches- some hate them.

You just hope that a coach doesn't make a player hate soccer or any sport. Too many things recently in the news, starting with Richie Burke at NWSL Spirit, Marlene Stallings from Texas Tech, Sylvia Hatchell from UNC, Maggie Haney for gymnastics around verbal and emotional abuse. Hard to figure out where the line is.

I do agree with you but when a coach abuses players that is different. You can hate coaches because they make you practice hard, not play you but when it comes down to mental abuse that a problem. There is a difference in being tough and being abusive. If that was my child he was mental abusing we wouldn’t have to worry about switching clubs because he wouldn’t be coaching

Some players may not do will under pressure. My daughter loves mike and liked that he held players accountable.

Don't know about that, but we have had a number of coaches say "if I pick them, I play them." Obviously this does not include issues of discipline like missing practices or bad attitudes. I personally feel like the coaches have enough information (especially if they have had the player themselves) that they ought to play who they picked. I have been on both sides of that issue too where my player got pulled off and a less skilled player was subbed in. I have also been on the end where my kid was the less skilled.

As to the other issue of coaches being liked or disliked for certain behaviors I do agree that some player's tolerance for some coach's words are better than others. All kids respond differently to that. There is a level that people can go past that some see as abusive and others don't. But if players think it is abusive it ought to be discussed with the club and the club should discuss with the coach. May not always need a firing but just some correcting

From what I am hearing they are switching clubs. Hopefully they were able to get some money back but I think we know the answer to that one

These girls play soccer at a high-level, they understand pressure. Calling a girl weird, telling another she has no personality and regularly telling the team they will not succeed because they lack character, is not holding them accountable - it's belittling them. 

Definitely reach out to other players from other clubs and DoC's. If its a GA player, they should have no issue getting on an ECNL/ECNL-R team quickly (transferring to a league managed by another sanctioning body cuts most of the red tape).

If there are multiple, a representative should speak to the NTH DoC and tell him they are leaving NOW.  He may jump and make a change.  If he doesn't, oh well, just contact AFU/Concorde/GSA/UFA directors and tell them you have players looking to move NOW.

Do folks know whether the clubs provide any training for their coaches on leadership, etc.?  I'm guessing not, but could be wrong.  The youth sports coach who takes the time and effort to find out what motivates their players on an individual level seems like a unicorn.  Obviously sometimes a team or player needs a kick in the pants, but my sense is that many coaches repeatedly fall back on a "the beatings will stop when morale improves" approach because they are either lazy or, more likely, they don't know any better.  As a result, I think there are a lot of kids out running around every day on the soccer field who are enjoying their friends but enduring the experience - just playing not to get yelled at, rather than playing with joy.  Perhaps the boards at these clubs might take it upon themselves to have the clubs train the coaches not just in tactics, but in some soft skills as well.  Might cost a bit of $$, but comprehensive coaching training may attract better coaches, which may in turn attract and retain better players...

Everyone has their own opinion. My wife's cousin played for Bobby Knight and to this day holds him in high regards. Many don't. So saying someone who yells and screams at kids (which he shouldn't don't get me wrong) maybe a fit for their child is their opinion not mine.

One thing that I thinks is sometimes lost in this discussion (and not saying the coach in question on this thread is not an a$# as we have had a run in or two with him as well years ago) but there is a line between being hard and holding players accountable and being an a$#. We have had one coach in particular that some folks think is yelling and too tough on the kids, but if you actually listen to how he goes about it, it is never personnel, never derogatory and always has a soccer purpose to his yelling. My daughter thrived with his style and would still run through a brickwall for him, but as I have said I have known a number of kids and parents who have no respect for him because if nothing else he holds them accountable.

dadofthree - I do agree with you, there's a line between being hard, holding players accountable and being an a$$. These girls have all played for demanding coaches. This isn't a case where he yelled at them and some got their feelings hurt. I cited some examples in an earlier post. He told a girl she was weird, another she has no personality and tells the team they lack character. This isn't demanding or making them accountable. It has nothing to do with soccer or coaching. It shows a real lack of maturity. Speaking of accountability, he's often late to practice. Perhaps accountability should start with him.

Often late to practice?  Yeah I'd be saying something to him and if my kid felt the repercussions of that with less playing time, I'd taking it up with the club . . . loudly.